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[ Yeah, no, that's the final straw. It's officially curtains for James Moriarty!

He's going to crawl into a tiny hole and die of embarrassment now, thank you very much!!

Dante gets a few moments to enjoy the deeply flustered expression on Moriarty's face before he suddenly disappears, taking the surprisingly soft and luxurious sensation of his furry ermine ears with him.

Rather than dematerializing, however, Moriarty has simply fully transformed, dropping to the office floor as a full-fledged ermine.

He immediately darts under his desk, his black-tipped tail flicking as he hides from Dante's view. ]

---!?

Moriarty!?

[ He...

Oh, his eyes are not fucking with him, right? HE JUST SAW THAT with his OWN EYES, Right?!

he's sort of stunned into silence before he remembers himself--quickly getting to his knees to try to find out where the--Moriarty? Ermine? Creature? went?! ]

--Hey, don't hide--come on, are--

Are you okay!?
...Why are you. So small, and cute?

YOU SAW NOTHING!!!

[ That's definitely James Moriarty's voice, albeit now coming out of a small white furry creature. Given that his coat is stark white, he's easy to see, even in the gloom under the desk, if Dante simply looks. ]

I'M NOT HERE RIGHT NOW! PLEASE LEAVE A MESSAGE AFTER THE BEEP!

[ Moriarty, that doesn't even make sense— ]

... [ oh he's EMBARRASSED about this. Dante's got a small smile on his face as he tries to look under the furniture to locate his partner--who's now an Ermine.
He can't seem to find him. He's gonna start following his voice.

...Aha. Blotch of white. Gotcha, there you are. ]

I ran all this way to see you...

Heheh.

And you're gonna' just turn me away because you somehow got a new skill to turn into a small and adorable little ... ...are you a weasel?

What I may or may not be is none of your business!!!

[ Yes, he is absolutely a weasel. More specifically, he's an ermine. ]

And stop calling me small and cute and adorable.

I am a grown man—who just so happens to be suffering from an unfortunate curse.

Don't you dare laugh.

I'm not laughing...

[ Moriarty HE'S ALWAYS LAUGHING, how is today any different from any other day.

But you can see it. you can see him choking down that little uneasy giggle he always does. a hand over his mouth and everything, painted nails so carefully pressed over his mouth. ]

But it's hard not to call something 'cute'... when it's cute.

It's like seeing a cat stretch...

You have to say 'ooh, big stretch'.... you know?

[ Dante likely can't see it due to their current respective positions—given that Moriarty is still under his own desk and all—but his little black-tipped tail begins lashing in annoyance. ]

OR YOU COULD KEEP YOUR UNWANTED COMMENTARY ENTIRELY TO YOURSELF.

[ For a creature so small, he's still surprisingly loud when he gets worked up about something. ]

Wow...

[ there's a genuine sound of delight and awe in his voice as he moves to cross his legs. Deciding to sit on the floor, waiting for Moriarty to come out and stop acting like a petulant brat. ]

For something so small, the set of lungs on you is truly amazing...

Heheh.

Here I was worried you might be in danger in this form...
But you could scare gods away with that voice...

[ He has never, not even once in his life, watched a cat stretch and then uttered the words "Ooh, big stretch" out loud. Ever. ]

Yes, well, I'm not exactly keen to get into a fight in this form.

Or in general, really.

[ Is it even possible for him to access his usual combat abilities in this form? Not that he really wants to risk conjuring flames while he's under an extremely wooden desk, but it's a thought to table for later. ]

Nevertheless, this shape is incredibly inconvenient for me—in more ways than one.

[ thats because you have no WHIMSY and you're in desperate need of it. ]

Ah, is this world a particularly peaceful one? Amazing. We get to be lawyers again and there won't be any fighting this time... what a dream come true...
[ these are Famous Last Words. ]

Hehehh...

So you've been in that form before.
That means you'll change back... right?

Of course I've been in this form before. Did you think your arrival just spontaneously coincided with me developing some kind of curse, right here and now, on the spot?

Unless that's what you were hoping for.

[ Has Dante been cursing his name in secret??? If Moriarty didn't know for a FACT whose fault this was, he might stop and wonder if Dante was the culprit. ]

Would you wish this upon me, Dante Alighieri!?

After everything I've done for you?!?!

Now, why would I 'hope' for that... we're already an odd duo when we face court cases together.

Can you imagine if I came up to the stand with a ferret or ... stoat, in my hand...?

Heheh... I'd be laughed straight out of court...

...

Maybe I should write a children's book about the Poet and the Stoat...

[ They absolutely are an odd duo in court, but Moriarty pins the blame entirely on Dante. Who wants a defense attorney dressed in rags who keeps creepily giggling behind the bench before every statement? ]

THAT'S the grand follow-up to your great work?!

[ From legendary poet to children's book writer. ]

Besides, my coat is white, so that technically makes me an ermine.

Anyway, yes, to answer your question: I should change back as soon as—um.

[ Shit, wait, like he's going to admit he needs to calm down first. That means admitting he got all flustered in the first place. ]

Eventually.

Shouldn't I take it easy after my great work...?

A lot of people recognised me in this city already, you know... I gave away a few copies... people even asked me to sign it...

[ he's absolutely sparkling, isn't it annoying?

As he leaaaaans over again to look under the desk at his friend. ]

...

Heheh, Mori...

You didn't finish your sentence. Don't think just because you're under there that I won't interrogate you for answers...

'As soon as you...' what.

[ Dante might LOOK and even ACT like an idiot, but that's far from the truth. It's why he's actually a good legal partner, despite his... everything. That said, right now Moriarty wishes he could sneak something past him—just this once. ]

I'm acquainted with the person who placed this curse upon me, you see.

For the record, it wasn't intentionally cast, but neither is it something that can be easily removed.

Based on his recommendation, if I want to transform back to my usual self sooner than later...

[ Dante better lean in, because he's going to say this in an extremely quiet voice. ]

I must relax.

[ You know, the thing he's famously really good at doing.

Moriarty is many things, but laid-back is not one of them. ]

[ 'i must relax'.

...
hm.
well... it's not... simple, per say--he's tempted to make a comment with 'but you never relax', but. As an example of exactly HOW sharp the man is despite how he acts, he decides to choose this battle and leave that comment under his tongue instead of letting it out.

It'll make the other yell again.

So instead, he thinks.
A thoughtful look on his face as he considers... ]

Well.

How about you come out from under there and take a nap with me on the couch, then.

...I'm pretty tired from all the... running around I've done today.

Nothing's more relaxing than an afternoon nap.
Once you change back we can decide what to do from there.

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm—

[ That low sound isn't a purr or a growl, but rather the annoyed hum of a man who doesn't want to admit Dante's logic is sound. ]

—fine.

I'm not tired, not even slightly, but going through the charade might prove... calming. Maybe.

Anyway, it's not like I have a better idea.

[ Saying so, the ermine finally creeps out of hiding, allowing Dante to behold his furry form in full. ]

[ ...is... he allowed to pick you up, sir? because he's gonna try to pick you up.

he won't HOLD him though--~~Bond level 6 at least is needed for something like that even if you are cute~~--he'll immediately move to put him on the couch with a plop. Figuring he'd have difficulty scampering up that himself. ]

It's a nice sunny day outside, despite the cold. And the room is such a comfortable temperature...

I've missed these old couches. I could have a nap totally easily...

Heheh.

So you'll just have to relax and try to turn back, too. Do you have a radio...? We could listen to some music while we siesta.

[ Moriarty is not THRILLED about being picked up, and his little paws dangle helplessly until Dante places him on top of the couch cushion. He grumbles under his breath for a few moments, only shaking off the brief annoyance when Dante references the comfortable temperature of the office. ]

Ah, that's probably the Divine Air Conditioner.

[ Is he going to explain further? Not at all. ]

There's the office gramophone, of course, but I won't be able to operate it like this.

I've heard you can use your smartphone to play music as well, although I won't be able to do that either.

...Divine Air Conditioner?
You have a... conditioner from heaven...

No wonder it's so nice in here...

[ he's gonna move to sit on the couch, right next to Mori. That's right--he's not moving over to the other side of the room to the other couch. He's gonna shift to lie down on the same one as Moriarty and everything. He's tapping at his phone, now... ]

It's okay. You take it easy in this form, I'll take care of it...

Heheh...

I'm too lazy to deal with that old thing right now. This thing has something called 'Spotify' on it... I think it's... ah, yes.

There's music. [ ...he's going to play classical, of course. ]

[ Is it from Heaven, specifically? It could be. He has no idea, frankly; all he really cares about is that it works as advertised, regardless of the origin of its "divine" status. ]

Hey, watch it!!

[ The couch is just barely big enough for one of them to lie down on top of, but there's not really room for both Dante and Moriarty, even if he's currently a weasel.

He's forced to scramble up onto the back of the couch, and once Dante has fully sprawled out, Moriarty leaps down on top of his legal partner's chest. ]

Were you trying to crush me?

[ Although Moriarty sounds the same as he always has, the visual impact has changed. He can't managed the same level of annoyed indignation when he's a tiny white weasel. ]

[ ...it's really funny, being able to see the exact emotions and silliness that Moriarty usually exudes while he's in such a little, tiny form. The stern, pure black eyes, the ears pinned back with that flat look the man fixes him with...

Delightful. ]

No. I expected you to be brilliant enough to move... and you did.

[ predictably, Moriarty moved to accommodate. He then reaches up with a hand to smooth fingers through the soft fur atop Moriarty's head, and down the back of his ... neck? Body? Cat Tubes are such weird creatures. ]

Hehheh.
You said you needed to relax in order to change back...

Just lying down and forcing yourself to sleep isn't relaxing...

So I thought I'd just do this.

[ HE IS AN ERMINE, NOT A "CAT TUBE", THANK YOU VERY MUCH. ]

Do what, exactly—?

[ His sarcastic demand is interrupted by the smooth gesture of Dante's hand.

It's definitely a weird feeling, although surprisingly not an unwelcome one. In fact, being stroked like an oversized pipe cleaner does something to his tiny stupid animal brain, causing Moriarty to shut up and let Dante do as he pleases. ]

[ get petted, idiot.
He won't offer any more words, as he knows, full well, that anything he might say in this moment might set the mouthy man off into some sort of rant and completely derail what he's currently trying to do.

Which is to mean that he's putting his phone on his coffee table and continuing to drag his fingernails along the others' fur, behind his ears, along the top of his head...

repeating the motion as he props his head up with an arm, letting his own eyes close. ]

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